Ad astra
by DarkHairedDreamer
Summary: Of angels and stars, Kairi knew well. Rated T for safety.


"I wanna visit the stars."

The simple phrase encompasses the silence over the three young children lying in the sand. The boys exchange glances before turning to look at their female companion.

"You can't visit the stars." says the oldest of the three matter-of-factually, rolling his eyes at the ridiculousness of the question."They're just balls of burning dust."

"You can too, Riku!" the little girl protests, sitting up to glare at the silver-haired boy. "My mommy says that's where the angels are!"

Riku simply scoffs at her. "You still believe in all those silly fairy tales?"

"They're not fairy tales! It's real! My mommy told me!" The little girl proclaims indignantly, pounding her small fist into the sand.

"You're such a baby, Kairi." The boy stands up, sprinkling the other top with the sand he brushed off. "I'm going home now; I can't be around you five year olds anymore. Sora, are you coming?"

The chestnut haired youth shakes his head, eyes transfixed on a twinkling star above. "I'll follow you."

Riku shrugs and walks off.

Kairi turns to him after she's sure he's gone, wide eyes expectant. "It's real." She says. "Mommy says that's why I'm here."

Sora stays silent, his little five-year old mind unsure of what to say.

"She says that sometimes, angels come down here and watch over us. The protect us and make sure we're okay and take care of us. She says they show up when we need them the most."

Kairi sighs, laying back down again. There's a brief period of silence as she continues to think. Her eyebrows are scrunched together and her mouth is set into a little frown until she makes a realization.

"Remember when you found me on the beach? " She asks him excitedly. "And you helped me and asked if I was okay? And you brought me to my mommy who isn't really my mommy because I didn't have anywhere to stay? And now you're my best friend who makes sure I'm always okay, even if I just fell and didn't even scrape myself up, but you always make me feel better."

Sora blinks, turning to look at the girl next to him. Her eyes shine brightly at him as she smiles.

"So I guess that makes you an angel too."

...

"What was it like, traveling through the worlds?" Kairi inquires, staring up at said celestial objects and waiting eagerly for the answers from her boys.

The trio are much older now, but they've been through so much in so little time. Old habits die hard, so they sit on the tree with the strangely curved branch, gazing up at the heavens, hearts heavy but moods light.

Sora smiles, placing his hands behind his head. "It was great, except I couldn't drive the Gummi Ship very well, so I didn't really have time to enjoy the scenery. I was more worried about how I was going to stop the thing once we got there."

Riku's smirk can nearly be seen in the darkness. "That wasn't driving. That was crash landing."

The expression on Sora's face causes a bout of laughter to escape Riku's mouth.

Sora turns to Kairi, pouting. "Will you hit him for me?"

Kairi sighs at him, acquiescing his request.

A solid punch to the arm from the redhead and a very loud "Ouch!" interrupts Riku's guffawing.

"Geez Kai, what have you been _lifting_?" Riku complains as he rubs the sore spot on his arm.

Kairi laughs and sticks her tongue out at him.

Riku continues to rub his arm as they continue to watch the night sky.

"Do you remember when I said I wanted to visit the stars?"

"Yeah, I remember." said Riku, chuckling as he remembered. "I told you that stars were just burning balls of dust."

Sora laughs at the irony. "Boy, were you wrong."

Kairi rolls her eyes in amusement. "Riku always did like to feel like he knew everything."

They sit in silence for a little, eyes searching the night sky.

Riku chuckled to himself, gaze never leaving the heavens. "So, do you ever wonder if there are any angels up there?"

Sora looks at him strangely and open his mouth to make a remark. "C'mon Riku, you're -"

"I know there are." Kairi interrupts.

Both boys are silent.

"How do you know?"

She smiles, thinking of how they are her angels - the ones who guard, who protect and keep the worlds safe.

"I just do."

...

When Sora and Kairi start to date, Riku gets third wheeled. _Hard_. He's completely forgotten for an entire week until his friends realize they've been living without him. And at first he's upset that his best friends have seemingly excluded him, but then he sees how Kairi looks at Sora with stars in her eyes and just _sighs_ because he knows they're a match made in heaven.

...

Sora's back is turned towards her as she makes her way down the shore. He's staring out into the sea and she wonders what must be going through his mind. She reaches out to grab his hand as they stand out to face the sea, the ring on her left hand glittering in the sunset. Kairi can feel that there is something different about tonight - his shoulders are tense and he's unusually pensive. She takes a deep breath, staring out across the horizon, understanding what's coming. They stand in silence and allow the waves to lap at their toes before he finally speaks.

"We have to go."

She sighs, squeezing his figures lightly in affirmation and braving a small smile.

"I know."

"Be sure to bring it back to me, okay?"

A worn trinket made of shells is pressed into his hands as Sora stands in the loading dock of their ship. The old phrase brings a bittersweet smile to his face, as he looks up at the luminous smile attached to the red haired being in front of him.

He chuckles, pulling her close to him, attempting to memorize every aspect of her before he left. The journeys were always long, and he ended up missing her more than he would like.

"I wish I could come with you." Her gaze softens, and she buries her head into his shirt.

He holds her for a long while, before Riku comes down and tells him that he's gotta go, and that he's gotta save it for when he gets back, because he's acting like he's never going to.

They all share one more goodbye and board the ship.

Kairi watches for as long as possible.

...

Kairi knows what she got into when she married him. She expected to ache while he was gone, she expected to see an empty side of the bed when she woke up for a long while.

She just never expected it to last forever.

...

The coffins are nailed shut at their funeral.

Half of her wishes that they would open them, so she could hold their hands one more time.

_(But it would have been too much to see their bruised and broken and lifeless bodies in their best Sunday suits.)_

She's angry.

How dare they shut up so much life in a padded box. How dare they chain down the wings of the most wonderful angels in the sky.

She's angry at them too.

How dare they leave her there, alone. How. _Dare_. They.

Because she knows - she knows - that they're going to the stars, but this time they had left her behind.

* * *

Wow, I really don't know why I've had this fic sitting in my notes for so long, but here you go. I've seriously procrastinated so hard on publishing this particular fic, but I'm not sure why. Just your classic angsty SoKai, for those who want more (like me).

\- DHD


End file.
